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25 December 2011 @ 07:50 pm
kiss the baby sky  
Hello, hello, guys. メリークリスマス!As in every other year, my family and I are totally void of the festive mood and go about the day as per usual, hur hur. Believe it or not, we used to make a really huge deal out of it before - we had Christmas music blasting on the stereo, and my dad would always take a video of the unwrapping ceremony of not-so-secret presents. Some dorama happened a couple of years ago, though, and the tradition was broken since it coincidentally fell on Christmas day - so I'm not exactly sure that we're all lazing around in boredom due to vacation inertia or if we're simply caught in the smoke of past grievances. I mean, I used to be a really hyper kid who got up in the morning to blast the Bee Gees and dance around the living room by myself shamelessly. Now I get up and then sit down to turn on the computer. Yup.

But don't get me wrong, I'm actually in a pretty content mood today. The air is calm, though not entirely still after a little something in the morning, but I mean, a little breeze once in a while is nice, right? (*≧▽≦) My tolerance for upsetting things has upped since junior college - now that was frustrating.

Man, I've been in such a lazy mood lately. My days can be summarised in a couple of words: exercise, essay, loaf.

I'm actually pretty proud of my exercise regime... thingimaj- well okay, it's just skipping - but I honestly surprise myself that I haven't bummed around and stopped doing it daily just yet. When I started out, I couldn't even skip through a four minute song (uh I remember quite clearly my first song was Wedding Dress by Taeyang #insignificantdetails), but now I can skip for twenty minutes without stopping! (。◕‿◕。) Whoever once told me that exercising improves blood circulation, metabolism and ultimately your general mood is very right indeed! But whoever told me that it improves productivity evidently isn't, hehe.

I've started applying for universities, too! I'm applying for a couple of universities in the US, one of which is ten minutes away from cindy's home! Cool beans. But the actual probability of entering an overseas uni is actually really low, with my family's financial condition in mind. As much as I do pass it off as a huge waste, I have no qualms about staying in Singapore with my family and preventing the accumulation of more loans - since we, after all, do have quite a few to pay off. I've read too many horror stories of foreign scholars in elite courses still being unable to get a decent job to pay off their debts due to the terrible economy - especially in view of the fact that I'm going into a less popular industry... to be honest, I'm totally terrified here that I won't be able to secure a job. The fact that I'm the oldest kid isn't exactly helping either, and my sis seems to laze around a fair bit (uh, sorry sis). This is besides the point, though.

But well I don't know, I feel like I'm just trying to convince myself here, really. But I do have something to prove to myself, and if I do, by the intervention of some higher being out there, get accepted into a US uni and have to turn it down, I know it'll help mend that awful self esteem problem I've been trying to get rid of for ages. It might sound rather narrow-minded, but my biggest fear right now is regretting to do the best that I can - I know I felt this way when I didn't apply for the Humanities Programme in Raffles, which I most probably would have got accepted for if I wasn't lost in my haze of ignorance and thought I would have been satisfied status quo, with little motivation to push myself. Yup.

Bemoaning stressful issues aside, I've been having lots of fun lately! I've actually gotten down to do many things I shied away from before: I joined a TCG, which had always looked fun but rules I had deemed too complicated to stomach (it's actually really simple). Things have been stagnating in the comm because the runners are running into real life problems, so I couldn't really trade as madly as I wished to. (´;ω;`) but joyce and marge are there, coincidentally! They've helped me out a lot, so I'm going to stick around and ride it through.

I've also signed up for some roleplaying community, Aather, at Dreamwidth under uh... Sakata Gintoki, and his personality is so apart from me I don't even. But I'll think of that after I get in - apparently it takes "a few weeks to a few months" for the application pool to enter the community as slots open. How srs bsns is that? But it's a really active community, so that I'm really looking forward to. I think RPing and characterisation is really interesting; I played Fuuta once at some Reborn RP comm, but I totally wimped out because I was insecure of my ability to portray him (he's such a minor character too!) and took the easy way out by resigning after a while despite getting the role in the comm. orz

An old friend is also organising some sort of Oofuri anthology and invited me to participate! I'm really out of the Oofuri fandom, and I'm not exactly sure if this is actually going to happen, but there're already a small group of artists/writers involved. I'm taking this as a really good opportunity to start drawing a lot more, especially since I've been dying to draw a fanbook for my OTP's for ages but never got around to it. AbeMiha, ret's go! (`Д´)ノ I really need to start planning and storyboarding really soon. ;;;

On a total anticlimactic note, I went out with a couple of friends the other day to the east coast, and we rode this totally awesome bicycle-car which was very obviously a rip-off of poor tourists' cash! Evidently cheap thrills aren't as cheap as they suggest to be, and my buddies offered to subsidise my contribution of the total cost, ahahaha, but I was really touched by that, thanks so much guys. ❤

Don't you think it looks really pretty though? The Christmas decorations are so cheesy, but I felt like it was going to take us on a fantasy ride to faraway land complete with sparkles and fairies any moment. Of course, it just took us on a very bumpy ride, and the sky decided to be funny and rain on us. We thought the shelter would surely rid us of the need of a wet weather plan - not, apparently, as we had to dry off at the nearest Mac's for quite a while.

But man, that was quite the adventure. I also really want to draw this odd vehicle right now. I mean, steering wheels on a bicycle! How hilariously awesome is that.
Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: キャンバス ♬ +Plus
b e l ♛: frustrations / of the kawaii nekociette on January 19th, 2012 05:21 am (UTC)
wow, now that sounds interesting. ' o ' i'm watching that. HAHA gosh i'm gonna watch everything i can while i'm still having my holiday asd;lfkajsdf
OH and sorry i missed it in your comment before about "how kids react to k-pop"! LOL tbh i felt pretty weird about kpop myself, but lmao some of the reactions are totally exaggerated, like the boy with the sandy blonde hair XD i'm quite surprised some guys + one girl liked super junior though! i thought i saw so many negative comments XD

omg rofl YOUR SIS XDDDD ... that is now our new bible
numbuh_009numbuh_009 on January 23rd, 2012 01:25 am (UTC)
When is your vacation over? And when is your next one?
It's fine :D IKR? I felt the need to punch some of them because they were clearing hamming it all up D:< Yeah, it was great that some kids liked SuJu though. And that one kid wanted to be an idol too XD Those kids have unwittingly turned three of the largest fandoms against them...

Amen to that. Have a better life by being undead \o/
b e l ♛ciette on January 27th, 2012 08:38 pm (UTC)
hmmm it depends on the school i get in! most schools open in august/sept or a little earlier... so believe it or not, i've got until then. though i should be taking animation classes and going internships/work on my own initiative and i think i will. XD i have no idea when my next holiday is because i'm totally ??? about uni schedules OTL and how about you cindy!

>Those kids have unwittingly turned three of the largest fandoms against them...
LMAO i laughed so hard at this. you're right, man. it's on youtube, a global video site as well. these children are going to receive hate mail... >) good job to the idol guy! i wonder what i would think if i was exposed to kpop at such a young age.. X'D who knows, maybe we would have started training early and got in at one of those global auditions /dreams

Edited at 2012-01-27 08:38 pm (UTC)
numbuh_009numbuh_009 on January 31st, 2012 12:52 am (UTC)
Woah, you've got lots of time then! Unless you decide to do something of course. I definitely think a class or internship is better than work (really because I'm in denial of the fact that I'm an adult and can therefore now enter the workforce...), but do your thing Belle! My next break is for one week towards the end of March and then I'm off for two months at the end of May. Already eagerly anticipating March ;A;

That's true. I'd probably have a similar reaction. I remember the first time I ever saw a SuJu MV (Bonamana) and I pretty much hated it :'D But yeah, those auditions are pretty much geared towards elementary kids rather than older people like us ;~; I sometimes wonder what it's like dedicating such a huge portion of your life to such a thing at such an early age.